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tarakath

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(no subject) [Mar. 27th, 2007|10:30 pm]
tarakath
its been a wack month or two.

98lbs before jamaica.

108lbs when i got back.

101-104lbs since ive gotten back.

fasting from now till tomorrow and thats that, i need to go shopping soon so being back too 100 or less is a must.
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(no subject) [Feb. 1st, 2007|09:23 pm]
tarakath
101.8lbs right now,

was 100.6lbs this morning and 99.8lbs about every other day of this week, except monday where i was 102.6lbs and then 99.8lbs the next morning.

i believe i am going to fast tomorrow because saturday i have to pick up marc and do not want to look fat... plus i go to jamaica on thursday.

THUS

i would like to be in the 90's.
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(no subject) [Jan. 23rd, 2007|07:20 pm]
tarakath
anorexia nervose (binge/purge type)

some girl called me bulimic today and then started telling me all bulimics ARE skinny and most aren't overweight.

i hate average people who know nothing but claim to.
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(no subject) [Jan. 21st, 2007|10:54 pm]
tarakath
gained weight this weekend as apposed to losing, gay.

18 days till jamaica, atleast 7lbs to be lost.

i'm 102.2lbs right now, and i would like to be 95 by jamaica.

tomorrow morning i'll probably be like 101lbs... then not eating.

ugh i just ate so much while working on this fucking stupid group project on friday/saturday/today.


like binged, for 4 hours.. spread out binge.
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(no subject) [Jan. 19th, 2007|12:02 am]
tarakath
i've been 98-99lbs all week, whatever but i want to lose like 2-3lbs by next week. thus meaning i would like to accomplish the 96lbs!

tomorrow i am going to avoid purging, my throat hurts from the few i did have this week.

so no binging, a salad with hmmm 3-4tablespoons of my low fat dressing.

lots of water! diet pepsi! maybe go buy some other diet things, who knows. just noooo binging, or purging.

i think i'm doing mush tomorrow, thussssssss i shall have quite the time hopefully as usual and not a bad trip
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(no subject) [Jan. 16th, 2007|12:43 am]
tarakath
i just read back a bunch of entries just to see how much things change and flunctuate and go up and down but lately my weights been at the lowest its been for the past 2+ years, i mean ive been lower but last year around this time i was probably 130lbs, and before that welllll all of the year before i gained lotsa weight 'recovering'

anyway, thats all.
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(no subject) [Jan. 16th, 2007|12:36 am]
tarakath
99.4lbs this morning and right now as i'm about to go to bed i'm 99.6lbs


ANYWAY, my weights been going back and forth between the 97-99 region, which i'm okay with right now.

i hate how my furnace isn't working and i wake up everyday fucking freezing my bones off, i hate how i cannot find my gold bikini and i would really like to find it before jamaica and i also hate how i am nearly out of smokes and UGHH.


that's all.

oh and i hate finals.


smoke timeee.
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(no subject) [Jan. 2nd, 2007|02:32 pm]
tarakath
98.4lbs this morning.

hopefully the fact that i used laxatives again for a couple times doesn't backlash on me and i retain hella water. then again i only did it a couple times, opposed to when i would do it everyday and buy endless packs always.

anyway i believe i will attempt to fast today, no! i will fast today! that's the spirit.
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(no subject) [Dec. 26th, 2006|01:33 am]
tarakath
december has gotten worse.. it seems like it's gone from somewhat slowing down on the binging and purging (i was doing it most weeknights, all night or atleast 3 or 4 times) to binging and purging once everyday.. it stopped for a bit inbetween but now my teeth have been KILLING me. which is weird it happens now, even though i've been puking since well... hmm early grade 6, before that i was just anorexic for a year. ANYWAY! now i am about 101.6lbs and i'm hoping tomorrow morning i will be atleast 100lbs or lower.. but yeah the past week i've been doing more 24 hour fasts, always breaking with a small binge.. none the less, dusting up my restricting skills cause i go to jamaica in just over a month.. thus i want to be 95lbs or lower, steady. i know i'll gain weight like mad there because its all inclusive. but maybe if by then i'm 95lbs i'll have more reason to be disgusted by food.

anyway.

i've really lost any desire to get better the past month, i wish i could say i'm better to everyone and play pretend again. sometimes i just remember when this was all secrets and so easy, ughhh. i wish now.
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(no subject) [Dec. 5th, 2006|07:57 am]
tarakath
102.4lbs this morning, things are going so much better.
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